Showers of Blessing

-Written by Katy Key (with assistance from Stan)-

stewarts
At church with dear family friends

Today was shower day.  It would be embarrassing to describe how much time and energy are required to get me clean and how others are involved in making it happen.  The first time I showered after coming home, I cried so hard I don’t think the faucet was even necessary to get me wet.  You see, sitting (!) in the shower I’m more aware of my broken body than anywhere else!  Here I feel most vulnerable and weak.  Like a small child, I have very little control over my body.

In the shower, perhaps more than anywhere else, I realize how dependent I am on Stan and Anna, my therapists and nurses, and others around me.

A doctor recently told me that his patients are typically more afraid of becoming dependent on others than they are of death itself!  I can understand the logic in such reasoning. I can’t stand, eat, get dressed, walk, shower, go to the bathroom, or visit with a neighbor without assistance. Becoming dependent is perhaps the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. There are moments when I say to myself, “I’d rather die!”

Why is dependence so debilitating?  What is it that we so deeply fear?

Jesus, the divine Son of God, said, “I can do nothing on my own… because I seek not my own will but the will of him who sent me” (John 5:30).  To be honest, most of my life I’ve skipped over that verse because it just didn’t make sense.  But lying helpless and paralyzed, I find those words speaking deep peace to my troubled soul.  Jesus was dependent on his Father, eternally dependent, daily dependent, gloriously dependent.  He did nothing without the Father’s help.

Realizing that Jesus lived in such constant dependence on his Father caused me to wonder if the independence that our culture values so highly has not been overrated.  Maybe being dependent on others is not such a bad thing after all!

Writing to the believers in Corinth, Paul describes a time in his life when everything seemed to be falling apart and nothing made sense.

For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia.  For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself.  Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death.  But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. (II Cor. 1:8-9.  Italics added).

I’m intrigued by the fact that most of us are going to leave this world in the same way we
entered it: completely dependent on someone else.  Apparently, there’s a lesson here that God wants us to learn.  No one gets into the kingdom of God through self-reliance!  To get in, we must become humble, dependent, and needy… like little children (Matt. 18:3).

As I have meditated on my needy condition I find myself thinking:  what made me ever imagine that I was in control of my life in the first place?  There was a time when I was healthy and my body was strong, when I pretended that I was in charge of my life and independent of others.

How foolish! Even then I was completely dependent on those around me: farmers, store
owners, architects, teachers, employers, etc.  My paralysis is only helping me to realize what has always been true!  I’m needy, broken, and can’t make it alone.  Becoming dependent is not the worst thing that can happen.  In fact, it may be the best!  It is those people who don’t realize how broken and needy they are who are most to be pitied (Rev. 3:17).

Now when I shower, I still feel helpless and vulnerable.  But the water washing over my body has turned into a shower of blessing!

Daring to Become Dependent
Receiving is an art.  It means allowing the other to become part of our lives. It means daring to become dependent on the other.  It asks for the inner freedom to say: “Without you I wouldn’t be who I am.”  Receiving with the heart is therefore a gesture of humility and love.  So many people have been deeply hurt because their gifts were not well received.  Let us be good receivers.  (Henri Nouwen).

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63 thoughts on “Showers of Blessing

  1. This is not only a wonderful piece of writing, Katy. It is deeply profound and rings TRUTH all the way through!!! I knew. I told my parents—God is going to use Katy mightily. He has left her speech and personality intact. Her right hand works to write the encouraging notes she used to send to people in need. And now she has so much more to say to all of us!!! I suspected He would make you a writer. You have been a writer all along. God has His ways. We’ll see where He takes you, Katy. But I am fully confident, as I have been right along, that His plan is totally good—even exciting. There is a glorious unfolding that has been taking place before our eyes. I was thinking just today, “We haven’t heard anything on the Key blog in a while.” You have not disappointed us!! Every entry is a treasure. This ranks right at the top! It’s so good to hear from you, too, to keep us praying. Thank you to all of you for keeping us in the loop and allowing us a glimpse (and more!) of the journey God has you traveling. Love to all,Judi Hehir

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Judi, while I don’t like the hard days you,too, are facing,along with hard decisions, I know the same loving Father who has watched obWe me in these months is watching over you and your precious parents. One of the losses for me is the independence of no longer being able to hop in the car and go see the people we love!would love to see you all! And perhaps God will make it possible still! In the meantime, give them both a big hug from us and let them know they r not forgotten but remembered in our hearts n prayers!
      Your words to me Judi in this comment are precious to me…..like apples of gold in a setting of silver is a word filter/aptly spoken. Thank u for blessing me in this way. All praise to Him!
      Much love,
      Katy

      Like

  2. You spoke to my vulnerability and you also speak peace and hope within the acceptance of dependency and how it brings us closer to whom Jesus wants us to be. Life without Christ Jesus is hopeless and with Him we can do all things…
    I don’t know you or your family personally but God brought me to this blog (ha ha – did He really know we would call our communications “blogs”??!!) I praise Him for you & your family. Jesus wants me to TRUST in HIM – and that is my biggest fight in this life – yet when someone like you comes along … My “walls” feel useless and I warm up to the idea of letting others in. In my 60+ years I think I can still do it on my own… And then I do something that reminds me (better yet- smacks up the side of my head) to prove how much I am so not in control. I have been truly blessed under the grace of God and have a good sense of humor and a willingness to serve yet my humanness gets in the way….. : o.
    Thank you & may God’s blessings rain on you and your family mightily. Thank you for this…. You have touched my heart profusely in a way no others can or have tried. Thanking God and giving Him the glory for how He works in our lives!!!
    Your prayerful friend in California!
    Please pray for my strength as I press on to take hold of which Christ Jesus took hold of me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s a 2 way street. Your words h ave touched me deeply and I am already prYing that both of us will press on and press intoHim, taking hold of all that He is and has for us. Thank you for following and commenting!katy

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I am not the most computer literate person around and tonight I was stumbling through a web site and this “side bar” thingy showed me I had a comment from you! I had no idea and was deeply touched that you would respond -especially to a stranger and knowing how many dear friends you have -as I am touched sweetly by so many of their comments on your posts….. To respond to mine made my heart leap! That was so generous of you!
        I love contemporary Christian music & one song I would like to recommend is “The Eye of the Storm” by Ryan Stevenson.
        All my best! Your new friend in CA – Kelly

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  3. Thank you so much! This is such a comfort somehow…. That we can release our striving and realize our dependence on Him …

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  4. Katy. Thank you. This deeply touched me and resonated in my soul. Thank you for listening to Gods leading, hearing his instruction and sharing it with the world. I’m blessed to call you my friend. G

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  5. This is a beautiful post. We are saddened with you that your body is so dependent, and this is a hard thing to accept and find contentment in, yet it is in God’s plan. Praise God that your mind is sharp and looking to Him. The real Katy is still there!!!! And God will use you mightily in ministry in a new a beautiful way. Thank you for encouraging and leading us in new exercises of trust and dependence.

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    1. Shirley, so kind of you to follow y journey when you are following so many others, you n Roger. We are eternally grateful for the comfort n care you give to those in very hard places. Thank you.much love, Katy
      Pray with us that someday I can make it back to Africa!

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  6. Dear Katy, In your “dependence” on God..for all…you are still ministering to my heart (and more people than ever before) through your journey. Ps 33:11 speaks to my heart this am and may Jesus speak to your heart through His Word as well. With love and prayers, Debbie Hitchcock.

    The Aaronic Blessing: The LORD bless you and keep you; The LORD make His face to shine upon you, and Be gracious to you; the LORD lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace. Numbers 6:24-26

    “The LORD bless you” …..means “God constantly bring good into your life.”

    “The LORD bless you and keep you” ….means God protect you. God build around you His safekeeping. The blood of Jesus and the Spirit of Christ be over you and keep you.

    “God bless YOU and keep YOU. God make His face to shine upon YOU.” One of the most precious things that we can have is living before the shiny face of God. There is such a radiance that comes out of a person with a shining face. And your face is meant to shine. Glory is meant to be shared from God to human beings. Glory always shines.

    “”The LORD be gracious to you.”…..gracious means the flow of love and His activity in creating what is good.

    In this blessing (I’m) asking for an entire atmosphere of God’s reality to be present on (you) under the invocation of God.

    From Dallas Willard, “Living in Christ’s Presence.

    Sent from my iPad

    >

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    1. So sweet of you to comment Linda. We’ve walked through dark days together. Thank u for walking thru these with us, cheering us on with your love n pRayers.
      Katy

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  7. Thank you for your words of encouragement. The LORD has used them already in my life.
    I continue to pray for you that the LORD’S strength will be made perfect in your weakness.
    Love, Barbara Green

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  8. As I am reading in 1 Samuel 16 today, the Lord’s words to Samuel are for you…”The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart.” You may feel broken, your body may, in human eyes, be a bit broken, but God sees you for who you are in the depths of your being, a vessel willing to be used for His glory and to be His witness. And those of us who know and love you, Katy, see His spirit alive and well in you. We are all broken and needy…from the very air we breathe to the salvation of our souls. Thank you for the reminder that even Jesus, the very Son, was dependent on His Father. Continuing to pray. 💖

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sandy,I love this reminder from the Word. Thank you! So glad He looks beyond the broken body to the heart of all.
      Katy

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  9. Dear Katy ,
    Your words and reflections on your new reality make me pause and seek a silent place to ‘agree’ before the Lord that His ways are unsearchable and His kindness is unfailing in our darkest times. You are ministering His Grace to all of us! Libby

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    1. You have blazed this trail before me. You have understood dependence on Him in ways ican oNly imagine! Thank you for leaving crumbs of Truth and comfort along the trail for me ! Some day I’m coming by for a visit! In
      His Grip together,
      Katy

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  10. Thank you for this insight on dependence. True humility requires complete dependence on our father in heaven. Yet most of our rely on ourselves more than our father. We are praying for you daily for healing and comfort. May God richly bless you.

    John & Wendy Richards

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  11. Dear Katy, words cannot describe the blessing that you have been to all of us. God is being glorified through your life. You have given us such deeper insights in to Jesus and His life here on earth and His dependence on His Father. What a living truth and reality that we need to be seeking in our lives. Stan, thank you for standing with your precious love gift from Jesus in your Katy. You all are one in Him and such a blessing to us May He continue to use your life for His glory. The verse that has taken on new meaning for me this year is Romans 8:34 Jesus is at His Father’s Throne interceding for us. Oh to come in agreement with what He is praying for you, me, our families is a deeper revelation as well. He knows what we need best and is praying for us. May His Kingdom be done through all of us this year. Love you and appreciate both of you so much.
    Linda

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  12. Katy, thank you for continuing to minister to all of us even now as you endure this hardship! What strength and faith God has given you! Praying for total healing for your body! Love you!

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    1. Oh my dearest Rose,
      Oh the dark days we have been through together and now y,out with me. I know you feel my pain even as I do bc our hearts are so one. You are a survivor too but even more an over comer! Thank you for leaning onHim all through it all so that we can get to the other side together!
      Love u!
      Katy

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  13. Good morning Katy,

    Such a powerful message.

    We are STILL receiving from YOU TODAY just as much as you are receiving from others. The sharing may be different today than it was yesterday.

    We love you and appreciate you so much!

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  14. What a great Blessing you are!!! Thanks for sharing! What a ministry GOD is giving you through sharing lessons you are learning from HIM!!! Thanks for being so open and honest and your TRUSTING IN JESUS! You are an Encouragement to me and to many many others. I thank God that HE has placed you in my heart, thoughts and Prayers. Love in Christ, Mary

    >

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  15. oh Katy, I have been thinking about you; I am not profound like your other friends that write here and I hope this comes across the right way; I was praying for you the other day and I was saying Lord, she is so broken and God whispered in my ear, not on the inside! I have chills writing this and like I said I am not professing to be a great Christian although I strive to be. You are so special and I am moved by this piece today. Love you and hope to see you sometime again. Always in my heart, Chrissy

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    1. Chrissy,
      I hope to see you too and as asking the Lord to make that reunion possible because it would do our hearts so much good to see you again! You will always be special to us because of the way you love Jesus and love us! Thank you for lavish love.
      Katy

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  16. Oh Katy, thank you for that most touching and awesome “post” of yesterday, and the picture was ever so precious too, of you and Stan and friends. Bless you, and what a mind you have, and a most convicting and yet inspiring reminder of what true dependence really means.

    Thank you for being willing to be His ministering servant, Katy, from your wheelchair. God bless you. I love you, and keeping you covered and lifted to Him in prayer for your complete healing.

    From my desk calendar, today’s promises is: Prov. 14:30 – “A heart at peace gives life to the body.”

    Please give Anna and Stan a hug for me and let them give you one, from me, too, ok? Camille

    On Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 10:26 PM, Journey with Katy wrote:

    > lizlind posted: “-Written by Katy Key (with assistance from Stan)- Today > was shower day. It would be embarrassing to describe how much time and > energy are required to get me clean and how others are involved in making > it happen. The first time I showered after coming” >

    Like

  17. Oh Katy, thank you for that most touching and awesome “post” of yesterday, and the picture was ever so precious too, of you and Stan and friends. Bless you, and what a mind you have, and a most convicting and yet inspiring reminder of what true dependence really means.

    Thank you for being willing to be His ministering servant, Katy, from your wheelchair. God bless you. I love you, and keeping you covered and lifted to Him in prayer for your complete healing.

    From my desk calendar, today’s promises is: Prov. 14:30 – “A heart at peace gives life to the body.”

    Please give Anna and Stan a hug for me and let them give you one, from me, too, ok? Camille

    On Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 10:26 PM, Journey with Katy wrote:

    > lizlind posted: “-Written by Katy Key (with assistance from Stan)- Today > was shower day. It would be embarrassing to describe how much time and > energy are required to get me clean and how others are involved in making > it happen. The first time I showered after coming” >

    Like

  18. Katy, what wonderful insight that can only be achieved through the Holy Spirit. You are strengthening us as He strengthens you. We continue to lift you to the throne!

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  19. Dear Katy; You just continue to bless me in so many ways! Today your post about dependence struck home with me because I am dependent on my children for many things now. I love living here with Sue, sharing her home and having her watch out for my welfare. I am still driving so can go my way most of the time. Sue, Mark and I flew to Tampa for David and Erika’s wedding on April 2 and then went on the cruise for 5 days. I could see how dependent I was for them to get me there. Never could have done it by myself. I can see the day coming when I may need a LOT of help and don’t like the thought of it. So your words encouraged me to be thankful for loving people as you have to care for you and for your wonderful spirit of seeing the Lord ‘s goodness in it all. I pray for your continual healing, peace and joy on the way.

    Love to you and Stan, Anna, Sarah, Elisabeth and family

    Mary Strickfaden

    Please note new Email: mhstrick2015@yahoo.com

    home: 847-639-9066

    cell: 847-624-3260

    Like

    1. Dearest Mary,
      Your life has been turned around like mine, just different circumstances. When we heard you were with Sue, we were relieved, grateful for Gods provision for both of you as youth establish a “new normal” after life altering loss.i thank thre Lord that you can drive and fly to the wedding. I know how you n Jack would travel to see family and to see us! In faraway places,so I’m hoping you can continue. And I’m still hoping
      We can come visit you sooner than later! Where is davidliving? I understand your dependence at this stage of life!oh how we trust in His grace to give us the grace to live with what He allows to pass through His loving hands.
      Sending our love,
      Katy n Stan

      Like

  20. Considering all you’re going through Katy, it’s understandable that you would feel broken and frustrated, but the rest of us see God’s miracle working in you!! Thank you for challenging us all to ask ourselves, “are we humble and totally dependent on God?”

    Some notes I came across by Joni Eareckson Tada, “When life is rosy, we may slide by with knowing about Jesus, with imitating him and quoting him and speaking of him. But only in suffering will we know Jesus. We learn things about God in suffering that we can’t learn any other way.”

    Katy, thanks for sharing your heart with us!

    Hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Katy, because of you, your words, and your example I won’t soon forget this lesson, but I must confess, I am one who has had to learn it again and again. Clearly, many of us have received from you, lovingly embracing your gift of God’s grace to us. Part of the reason, it is so easy to receive from you and welcome your advice, encouragement, reprimands, etc. etc. is because of your humility. Many of us don’t share your humility, which God has gifted you with. We attempt to “run the race, with our eyes on the prize”, without realizing how much we need each other to complete the race, by God’s grace working through others. Since you have been such an example of Christlike humility and graciousness, even in your pain, it “spurs us on to greater works of love and mercy” to and for others. What a disciple of Christ you have been! Indeed, as Churchill said of the British in WWII, “This may, indeed, be our(your) finest hour”. I know it hasn’t been easy and I am extremely aware of the sacrifice of family, but you receive so well, they must be honored to be a part of this journey that ultimately leads to being made perfect in Christ.

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  22. You are a blessing indeed! Thank you for always sharing from your heart and being so transparent. That is what I have always loved about you and Stan. I remember how hard dependence was when I first became a single mom, but the love of my Savioe and friends got me through. I would some days wait all day before asking for help, particularly when finances were involved. Continue to pray for complete restoration of your body. Love you and hugs to all!❤️🙏🏻

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    1. Love and hugs to you too, Nancy. Wish I could have known u and been there fo you as a single mom!i know you have leaned on The Everlasting Arms for a very long time.Leani,ng eith you on The Only One who can hold us….and at the same time!
      Katy

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  23. Sweet Katy and Stan: Thank you for the clear way you remind us of what we should already, but sometimes don’t seem to realize about our great need to be entirely dependent upon our Marvelous Father.  Many of us (including me!) verbalize that we wouldn’t want to try to take one step without relying on our Jesus, but we run our lives as though that is completely not the case.  We so appreciate all that you two and Anna have shared over the last several months.  What a great testimony to the power and faithfulness of The Trinity! Still loving and praying for you, Aunt Jean and Vern & Bevan

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    1. be an,Vern and Aunt Jean,what a thrill to see your names and read you thoughtful post. When can u come to Wilmore again?we would lo.ve to see u all! In the meantime, know that u are always in our hearts and welcome on Lowry Ln! Much love,katy

      Like

  24. Your body might be broken, but your mind and ability to communicate what God is revealing to you in your dependent state surly are not

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  25. I struggle to find words that adequately express the blessing that you are to all of us who love you. While I weep with you in your trials, I thank God for the way you are letting Him use you. And be assured that I pray for you each day, with love.

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    1. Ruth,
      Hearing from you is always a blessing. You have been behind us n beside us cheering us on for a very long time. I’m so very thankful the cloud of witnesses He gives us is not hust On the other side but here n now as well!
      Thank u for your continua l love n prayers.

      Like

      1. Katy, I am Susie Lyons sister in law. She has told me your story and today she shared your blog with me.
        It really resonated with me. We are ALL so afraid of being dependent…you are right! I will think about your words a lot !
        Thank you for sharing your experience and your wisdom.
        Mary Pearce Wilson

        Like

  26. Dear Katy, it is one thing to go through this humbling experience ,but to be able to articulate it so clearly and beautifully,what a gift. Thank you Katy we neve know when we will need such a lesson. In the picture I still see the Katy sparkle in your eyes. Praise God. I will treasure this lesson. Pat

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  27. Thank you for sharing how God is working. I have been and will continue to pray for you. I have not met you, but know your Dad and sister. I am one coordinating weekly prayer reminders for Cherry Run camp meeting where your husband is scheduled to preach. Many from there are praying for you.

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  28. You continue to minister to both of us! You are proof that He can use us in all parts of our journey and with a grateful heart. Thank you, Katy.

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  29. Katy, Thank you for all that you continue to teach us! Love, Bill

    On Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 10:26 PM, Journey with Katy wrote:

    > lizlind posted: “-Written by Katy Key (with assistance from Stan)- Today > was shower day. It would be embarrassing to describe how much time and > energy are required to get me clean and how others are involved in making > it happen. The first time I showered after coming” >

    Like

  30. This was so beautiful! Just like Katy! We love you so much Katy and I’m praying for Wilson and your leg to start moving! Big hugs and kisses!

    Love, Sherri

    Sherri Letchford PT, DPT, C/NDT Director of Allied Health and Clinical Head of Physiotherapy AIC Kijabe Hospital, Kenya

    >

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  31. Dear Katy
    My brother Steve Clark was my biggest fan and cheerleader in life. His enthusiasm and certainty of success in what ever I was attempting is a gift to me that I still have, because I can still hear him in my heart. I have a dear friend who suffered stroke so I understand (as much as I can) something about your experience. And I want to encourage you to keep writing. Sharing as you have, you teach people about human experience – and though we may be handling a different set of problems, we can relate. After reading this post, I’d like to encourage you to keep writing – and to try and write a book. Everyone’s experience is different, but persistence and patience seem to be a common theme in the road to recovery. And recovery is never a return to the state before that day – but to a place of change. Which is normal, even without a challenge like yours. When ever I feel particularly challenged, I ask God to help me behave with Grace. It seems like that is what you are doing. I just know if Steve was here, he would be singing to you, and trying to lift your heart as best he could. You have a gift of writing. It may be difficult now, but six months from now it will be different. How is only something God knows. Peace and Light to you and your family.
    Jeanne Lightbody

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